Things really are going good here in Knoxville, but reality is that I'm:
extremely tired,
emotional,
frustrated,
and anxious.
Aug 16, 2009
Aug 14, 2009
Still Feeling Crazy
This week has been INSANE! I've been working in Crossville, which is about an hour from Knoxville and just on the other side of the Central Time Zone. We've been working 8-5:30 their time. We leave here at 8, get there at 8, work til 5 or 530 and get home around 730.
Wow, I'm tired.
Life is good though! I celebrated Nick's birthday last night with him and a bunch of his friends who just happen to be friends of mine too and it was so fun! We went to Litton's (best burgers in Knoxville) and then to the DGB, my fav! It was such a great time to hang out with friends and relax. I so needed that. Even though we stayed out til 1130 almost, it was so much fun! I am kind of paying for it today. We went into work early this morning to get some stuff done. I do not have anything to do tonight and that makes me so happy! :) I'm sitting in my pajamas. Just finished eating left over Thai food and am looking forward to watching a movie on TV or cleaning up my apartment. You wouldn't believe how messy it can get in one week without time to keep it up!
I'm looking forward to a relaxing weekend!
Hope yours is great too!
LOVE!
Wow, I'm tired.
Life is good though! I celebrated Nick's birthday last night with him and a bunch of his friends who just happen to be friends of mine too and it was so fun! We went to Litton's (best burgers in Knoxville) and then to the DGB, my fav! It was such a great time to hang out with friends and relax. I so needed that. Even though we stayed out til 1130 almost, it was so much fun! I am kind of paying for it today. We went into work early this morning to get some stuff done. I do not have anything to do tonight and that makes me so happy! :) I'm sitting in my pajamas. Just finished eating left over Thai food and am looking forward to watching a movie on TV or cleaning up my apartment. You wouldn't believe how messy it can get in one week without time to keep it up!
I'm looking forward to a relaxing weekend!
Hope yours is great too!
LOVE!
Aug 9, 2009
Feeling Crazy
I can't put into words the way my heart feels.
good. bad. excited. scared. anxious. happy. frustrated.
there's so much going on at one time. my brain never rests. for the past month my thoughts have been jumping from:
YAY! Work!
knoxville.
greenville.
moving.
friends.
visits from friends.
missing friends.
condo.
whoa.
condo.
comcast.
comcast sucks.
sell?
rent?
knoxville.
friends.
work.
work.
texting.
traveling.
missing DPC.
hamilton.
momise.
caldwell.
family.
busy.
gym.
deep breaths...
one thing at a time...
i can do this.
good. bad. excited. scared. anxious. happy. frustrated.
there's so much going on at one time. my brain never rests. for the past month my thoughts have been jumping from:
YAY! Work!
knoxville.
greenville.
moving.
friends.
visits from friends.
missing friends.
condo.
whoa.
condo.
comcast.
comcast sucks.
sell?
rent?
knoxville.
friends.
work.
work.
texting.
traveling.
missing DPC.
hamilton.
momise.
caldwell.
family.
busy.
gym.
deep breaths...
one thing at a time...
i can do this.
Aug 8, 2009
Busy Schedule
So this past week was my first week of out of town travel for work. We were in Johnson City for the week. The work went well and I think that the more familliar we (the audit team) get with the process and the work, the easier it'll be. We've completed two audits at this point.
It was weird to stay in a hotel room by myself. I hadn't realized that it would be weird. I guess I've just always been with friends or family when I've stayed in a room and been with other people. It was so good to be in Johnson City and see friends. I met with friends for dinner every night but one and it was so fun to be in town for a few days. It was weird to travel and not be home. I thought that I would have a nice relaxing weekend to recover from being out of town for the week but it's turned out to be crazy.
It's saturday night and I haven't even unpacked from the week! I ran in last night, changed clothes and ran out to meet a friend for dinner and a movie. We saw Julie and Julia and it was so good. I really liked it! I would love to cook my way through a cookbook! Which is what Julie did - she cooked her way through a Julia Child cookbook! I came in late and went to bed, slept late, went and got my nails did with Mel-Dawg - who's finally back from China - waited on the cable folks who never showed up, dinner with Diana and now to bed again! I think tomorrow will be pretty laid back -lunch with Kevin and Kathy and then hopefully nothing for the rest of the day! It'll be good to relax and take it easy for awhile!
Hitting the road again next week for work. We'll be working in Crossville, which is an hour away. We'll be driving every day. It wont be that bad but it's across the time zone so we'll be getting home late every night. But I really dont think it'll be a bad drive. We'll carpool and we won't have to leave as early...if we leave here at 8 AM we'll arrive in Crossville at 8 AM. But leaving is going to be hard - we'll leave Crossville at 5 PM (6 PM Knoxville time) and get home around 7ish Knoxville time.
Off to sleep :)
It was weird to stay in a hotel room by myself. I hadn't realized that it would be weird. I guess I've just always been with friends or family when I've stayed in a room and been with other people. It was so good to be in Johnson City and see friends. I met with friends for dinner every night but one and it was so fun to be in town for a few days. It was weird to travel and not be home. I thought that I would have a nice relaxing weekend to recover from being out of town for the week but it's turned out to be crazy.
It's saturday night and I haven't even unpacked from the week! I ran in last night, changed clothes and ran out to meet a friend for dinner and a movie. We saw Julie and Julia and it was so good. I really liked it! I would love to cook my way through a cookbook! Which is what Julie did - she cooked her way through a Julia Child cookbook! I came in late and went to bed, slept late, went and got my nails did with Mel-Dawg - who's finally back from China - waited on the cable folks who never showed up, dinner with Diana and now to bed again! I think tomorrow will be pretty laid back -lunch with Kevin and Kathy and then hopefully nothing for the rest of the day! It'll be good to relax and take it easy for awhile!
Hitting the road again next week for work. We'll be working in Crossville, which is an hour away. We'll be driving every day. It wont be that bad but it's across the time zone so we'll be getting home late every night. But I really dont think it'll be a bad drive. We'll carpool and we won't have to leave as early...if we leave here at 8 AM we'll arrive in Crossville at 8 AM. But leaving is going to be hard - we'll leave Crossville at 5 PM (6 PM Knoxville time) and get home around 7ish Knoxville time.
Off to sleep :)
Aug 2, 2009
Sunday Reflections
This Sunday, I went back to Redeemer in Knoxville. The sermon was taught by a Carson-Newman grad who is a pastor/music leader at Redeemer. The lesson was about waiting. His main points were 1) Expect to wait 2) Be Prepared to wait 3) Know what we're waiting for.
Recently coming out of a period of waiting in my life, this sermon caused me to be very reflective over the past few months/weeks. I'm not sure that all this change has sunk in my head yet. It's all been so fast and so much all at one time. It's all good, for sure, but it's just a lot. I've been waiting for so long for something to happen. I'm still reflecting of this lesson but these are my initial thoughts.
There were two things that Matt said today really made me think. The first was that God has something for us in the waiting periods of our lives. I'm still struggling with this. I feel like I might never know what the waiting period of the last 8 months was for. Maybe it was to change me. To allow God to take HIS time and mold me and teach me about His timing. I do feel like some things about me have changed. I'm a lot less of a planner, for one thing...this could be good and bad. I have a lot more empathy for others. And part of me just feels different. Different in a good way. It's hard to describe. This waiting period was definitely also a learning period.
The second thing Matt said that stuck out to me was "how you wait depends on what you are waiting on". This is so true. When we wait in line or waiting at a restaurant, we're impatient becuase we're hungry. When we're in line at the grocery store, we're impatient because there's 1234098 registers and only one cashier (Thank you Wal-mart and Target). What about waiting on Jesus to come back? Do we, as Christians, really live our lives like we're waiting on the Savior of the World to return? Also, if we're living our lives in the waiting...are we really living our lives? So much of life can pass by without even realizing what has happened. Sharon, a new friend, commented that she felt like so much joy is lost in waiting. Are we letting life pass us by because we're waiting on that one certain thing to happen? So often, we make excuses, saying "if this one thing will just happen, then I'll __________..." You fill in the blank.
What are you waiting on?
How much of human life is lost in waiting? - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Recently coming out of a period of waiting in my life, this sermon caused me to be very reflective over the past few months/weeks. I'm not sure that all this change has sunk in my head yet. It's all been so fast and so much all at one time. It's all good, for sure, but it's just a lot. I've been waiting for so long for something to happen. I'm still reflecting of this lesson but these are my initial thoughts.
There were two things that Matt said today really made me think. The first was that God has something for us in the waiting periods of our lives. I'm still struggling with this. I feel like I might never know what the waiting period of the last 8 months was for. Maybe it was to change me. To allow God to take HIS time and mold me and teach me about His timing. I do feel like some things about me have changed. I'm a lot less of a planner, for one thing...this could be good and bad. I have a lot more empathy for others. And part of me just feels different. Different in a good way. It's hard to describe. This waiting period was definitely also a learning period.
The second thing Matt said that stuck out to me was "how you wait depends on what you are waiting on". This is so true. When we wait in line or waiting at a restaurant, we're impatient becuase we're hungry. When we're in line at the grocery store, we're impatient because there's 1234098 registers and only one cashier (Thank you Wal-mart and Target). What about waiting on Jesus to come back? Do we, as Christians, really live our lives like we're waiting on the Savior of the World to return? Also, if we're living our lives in the waiting...are we really living our lives? So much of life can pass by without even realizing what has happened. Sharon, a new friend, commented that she felt like so much joy is lost in waiting. Are we letting life pass us by because we're waiting on that one certain thing to happen? So often, we make excuses, saying "if this one thing will just happen, then I'll __________..." You fill in the blank.
What are you waiting on?
How much of human life is lost in waiting? - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Jul 30, 2009
Time
Time flies when you're......
...working a lot! I'm really enjoying my job. I'm working a lot (but not a lot of over time) and things are busy (but not too busy)! We did our first audit last week and that went well. I think. My manager had 5 pages of review notes today (most of which weren't mine and that made me happy!!) We are going out on our second audit next week and we'll be staying the week in Johnson City so I'll be hopefully visiting with friends at night while we're in town! We'll probably be there all week but we might be coming back Thursday night. I'm looking forward to traveling and being out of town for the week, even though its for work.
...really tired. I'm beat. Tonight I worked out with a trainer and she totally kicked my butt. I'm so tired, it's going to be a battle to get dressed in the morning. We did pretty much all arms/shoulders/core and I am worn out. It's not even 10 and I think I am going to bed. It was a GREAT workout! I felt like I'd worked out with Holly!
...looking forward to the weekend! This weekend should be fun. I'm going to have a girls night with some friends tomorrow night. Saturday Joetta and Justin are driving through on their way to Charleston for the week and I am super excited to see them. I haven't seen Joetta since her wedding last April! Almost a year and half ago! Sunday I'm planning on going to Redeemer church. It's so similar to Downtown Pres. It's a PCA church and it's downtown and close to campus. I visited there last week and really enjoyed it. I'm looking forward to going back this week!
...working a lot! I'm really enjoying my job. I'm working a lot (but not a lot of over time) and things are busy (but not too busy)! We did our first audit last week and that went well. I think. My manager had 5 pages of review notes today (most of which weren't mine and that made me happy!!) We are going out on our second audit next week and we'll be staying the week in Johnson City so I'll be hopefully visiting with friends at night while we're in town! We'll probably be there all week but we might be coming back Thursday night. I'm looking forward to traveling and being out of town for the week, even though its for work.
...really tired. I'm beat. Tonight I worked out with a trainer and she totally kicked my butt. I'm so tired, it's going to be a battle to get dressed in the morning. We did pretty much all arms/shoulders/core and I am worn out. It's not even 10 and I think I am going to bed. It was a GREAT workout! I felt like I'd worked out with Holly!
...looking forward to the weekend! This weekend should be fun. I'm going to have a girls night with some friends tomorrow night. Saturday Joetta and Justin are driving through on their way to Charleston for the week and I am super excited to see them. I haven't seen Joetta since her wedding last April! Almost a year and half ago! Sunday I'm planning on going to Redeemer church. It's so similar to Downtown Pres. It's a PCA church and it's downtown and close to campus. I visited there last week and really enjoyed it. I'm looking forward to going back this week!
Jul 27, 2009
Recently Reminded
I've recently been reminded of the story of the Prodigal Son from Luke. Most of my life usually when I've heard a sermon on this topic, it's been about the younger son, the one who ran away. But over the past week especially, and really over the last few months, I've heard lessons on the older brother.
The post below this one references a Stuff Christians Like post that is about this same thing. This past Sunday I went to Redeemer Church in Knoxville. It was so good. It was almost just like being back at Downtown Pres. The speaker, who is a friend of Brian's from DPC, did a great job with this lesson. He said some things that really stood out to me.
The desvestating truth is that the older brother, the duty-do-er, is more lost than the younger brother. He confuses faith and duty. This is totally me. I generally follow the rules and do what I'm supposed to do and forget that I am not the one that determines my relationship with Jesus. Both sons are blind to who their father really is. I definitely sometimes forget and don't remember who the Father is. We are generally suspicious of Jesus' love. This can only be changed by the astonishing certainty that JESUS LOVES US!!! No one has ever or will ever love me like Jesus. I do not determine my relationship with Jesus. This was huge for me to realize. It is not up to me!
"God is God. Because He is God, He is worthy of my trust and obedience. I will find rest nowhere but in His holy will, a will that is unspeakably beyond my largest notions of what He is up to." - Elisabeth Elliot
The post below this one references a Stuff Christians Like post that is about this same thing. This past Sunday I went to Redeemer Church in Knoxville. It was so good. It was almost just like being back at Downtown Pres. The speaker, who is a friend of Brian's from DPC, did a great job with this lesson. He said some things that really stood out to me.
The desvestating truth is that the older brother, the duty-do-er, is more lost than the younger brother. He confuses faith and duty. This is totally me. I generally follow the rules and do what I'm supposed to do and forget that I am not the one that determines my relationship with Jesus. Both sons are blind to who their father really is. I definitely sometimes forget and don't remember who the Father is. We are generally suspicious of Jesus' love. This can only be changed by the astonishing certainty that JESUS LOVES US!!! No one has ever or will ever love me like Jesus. I do not determine my relationship with Jesus. This was huge for me to realize. It is not up to me!
"God is God. Because He is God, He is worthy of my trust and obedience. I will find rest nowhere but in His holy will, a will that is unspeakably beyond my largest notions of what He is up to." - Elisabeth Elliot
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