The Bible Study that I've been doing is a Beth Moore called Praying God's Word. We're just reading through the book - not doing the extended Bible Study. Each week has a different "stronghold" that everyone struggles with and then scripture in the form of prayers that deal with each topic. The topic this past week was rejection. That's a tough topic to deal with. I don't deal with it. My typical response when rejected is "well, it's certainly not my fault. what's wrong with them? Him? Her? It's THEIR loss." Never my fault, never because of who I am. If it is because of who I am, then, well I don't even want to go there! I have chosen not to deal with it. It's not that I've ever been rejected, because I certainly have: friendships, guys, other relationships, work. Ouch. Yeah, it hurts.
In talking about rejection, my friend Melissa suggested that a related topic is forgiveness (a chapter later in the the book that we're skipping ahead to read this week). Ouch. Again, stepping on my toes a little. I like to hold on to things a little bit. Usually when I've been wronged by someone that I know, I like to dwell on that, harbor it, let it hurt my feelings and then make me angry. After that I usually leave it...for a while. But then, I like to come back to it and get mad about it again. For instance, there's this girl that really made me pretty angry this one time in college. She wasn't even really one of my friends but we had to work together. Even, right now I'm getting fired up about that. It was 2004...over 6 years ago...LET IT GO, MARIE!!
Well, in thinking towards this topic of forgiveness (I haven't started reading for Bible Study this week), I opened up my email this morning to see the topic of Michele's weekly newsletter was forgiveness. Michele wrote a poem about forgiveness - this is an excerpt from it.
Oh, it's forgiveness we need. The whole big planet of us.
We know how.
And we know who.
[It's us. To each other. For each other.]
Let's not make the past hurt the present.
Let's not let them drive our days.
Let's acknowledge the pain (it's real) and allow ourselves the grace to be better.
The truth is that deep down inside, every time I've been rejected (no matter the relationship), there's a little bit of me that says I'm not good enough. Deep down, a little piece of me thinks that I'll never be good enough. This is usually just a fleeting thought and I cover it up with the "it's their loss" thoughts. Beth Moore's whole thought process seems to be: yes, it hurts to be rejected by people, but God will never reject you. All the scripture verses this past week were about God's love and kindness and acceptance. I love that. It's so good to know that "no matter how I may encounter rejection in the world around me, I am welcomed to abide in the Creator of heaven and earth and the perfect Son of the Most High God." - Beth Moore
This week, as I ponder and read about forgiveness and "the grace to be better", I'll leave you with this:
Peace, I leave with you, my peace I give to you, not as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. John 14:27
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